Inspired by Progress

I'm optimistic today about Andrew. He keeps bumping up against difficult situations, both at home and at school, but he immediately talks to himself saying "But I'm still a really good boy." He doesn't only mutter the words, but seems to feel them as true. This is major progress for a perfectionistic, traumatized child who was told for nearly 7 years that he was worthless ('trash' was the operative word). He keeps having successes and patting himself on the back, and when he has failures he quickly reassures himself without us having to prompt him.

He's also showing major progress regarding attachment. After two years he's finally expressing a need to have Mom around when he's at school. Instead of voicing this, he keeps going to the nurse and faking tummy aches so he can call me and talk on the phone. Yesterday was the last straw because it was becoming disruptive, so I had a talk with him after school. I had to explain how important it is to be honest about his body because I won't believe him when he's truly sick or hurting. He finally broke down in tears, confessing "I only wanted to hear you on the phone, Mom. I miss you so much at school and I want to see your eyes." It was very touching and sweet, and reminds me of healthy toddlers who venture out to preschool for the first time. That longing for Mommy is deep, and I wondered how long it would take him to get there. He promised never to fake a tummy ache again and said he would use his imagination to see my eyes today. Oh, what a gift it is to be all my boys' first loves! Sky is still telling kids at school he's "Taken" because his "heart belongs to Mommy." I will miss these sweet years when they're older.