Why Not?

I don't like to harp on this, and probably won't again. We are so often asked "why" regarding our choice to adopt internationally (or adopt in general)....especially again. Especially when we already had biological children, and now have completed two adoptions and will soon have a clan of 5. People outside the adoption community seem to have a more difficult time wrapping their minds around it, including relatives, colleagues, and friends. I suppose it's a human need to rationalize a "why". The simple answer that immediately comes to Daniel and I is "Why not?" Honestly, the question stumps me the way "Why are you doing something marvelous?" would stump anyone. Maybe the answers below will help end this discussion for many, not just those who know us, but for all who know families who have adopted children and have the same question. One parent I know has had children by three's- First three, then three more, and now awaiting three more from Ethiopia. I was recently inspired by her blog to list the personal "whys" that are in our hearts:

-Because we have a strong sense of how short life is. It's brevity makes us want to fill our cups with as many happy memories and touch as many lives as possible.

-Because when we are on our deathbed we won't be thinking about the cars we didn't buy, the larger house we could have had, or the trips we could have taken with the money. We'll be thinking about how well we loved and how many hearts we touched with depth and sincerity.

-Because we never know how long we'll live. To live for a quiet retirement of travel, or in a quiet, childless house is completely futile if we never make it to retirement. We live for "now" and fill our plates to overflowing until we take our very last breath.

-Because maternal instinct and drive was built into me so strongly that it's my greatest passion. I love my job and can't think of anything else I'd rather do than nurture another child. It's my dharma.

-Because I feel a deep drive to serve individual souls this way. To help those who may have never reached their full potential have the most happiness possible, and find their own higher purpose is deeply rewarding.

-Because we have seen severe poverty, disease and hardship in India and Guatemala, and have been very affected by the unthinkable numbers of children in need of families. We know that adoption does not eliminate the orphan crisis, but if we can end the suffering of one more child and help expand awareness we feel compelled to do it.

-Because all children deserve a loving and supportive family, whether here in the US or abroad.

-Because even though we don't have room in our house for another child, we can make room.

-Because this quiet but persistent call within our hearts doesn't allow us to do nothing.

-Because we don't live in fear, worrying about negative outcomes or problems we may cause ourselves. We live from a centered place of love and trust, and in that sacred place it feels supremely right.

-Because we never underestimate ourselves and what we are capable of.

-Because we don't view another child as a burden, as expensive, as an obligation or more "work". Each child adds a new dimension to our family that we cannot imagine living without. Their presence always makes up for/casts out any ideas of hardship.

-Because we know and trust that everything we need will be given to us at the right and perfect time. This has proven itself to be true time and again, therefore we do not beleive in lack.

-Because we are grateful for all we have in our lives and welcome more gratitude.

-Because we crave more, ever new, ever expanding joy in our family.

-Because we know that she will shine her light on each of us in different ways and cannot say "no" to these possibilities.

-Because it is a calling felt deep within our core. Both of us feel called to this, together.

-Because we love all cultures and work daily to embrace them all as our world family. Having a multi-racial family will give us great lessons and personal growth that we can't even imagine yet. This excites us.

-Because all children are beautiful and equally deserving whether brown, pink, tan, yellow or white. Regardless of birth country, heritage, or genetics we are all one family and our's will reflect this.

-Because we still feel very young at heart and have so much to give another child. We can't imagine wasting this.

-Because we believe there is another soul calling to us, who is already part of our family.

-Because, selfishly, when we are very old we will want as many children around us, checking on us and loving us as possible.

-Because we don't see anything more worthy of our time and resources than welcoming another beautiful, brilliant soul into our lives.

-Because we like taking risks by biting off more than we can chew, and just chewing it! This practice has never failed to give us great joy. When we trust and say "yes" we are always rewarded in more ways than expected.

-Because who could say "no" if they won the lottery? Each new child has felt that way....a tremendous blessing and we often have to pinch ourselves.

-Because my gifts and talents are specifically geared toward mothering, nurturing and helping those around me gain strength, peace and joy. The sacred duty of Mothering was stamped into my heart before birth.

-Because I believe that Divine Mother is working through me to raise my children, and I am simply her vessel.

-Because parenthood is an honor, and each new child is a precious gift to ourselves.

-Because we don't want to say "no" to having more fun.

-Because children keep us young and inspire us to take even better care of ourselves. We look forward to being around long enough to see and care for our baby girl's children.

-Because she will teach us more than we will ever be able to teach her, and we will need her far more than she will ever need us.

-Because Love is the most awesome power in the universe.

copyright 2009, Christine Peebles